Last week I hit my breaking point. Rock bottom. And I am now ready to go into recovery. What's the solution for being too busy? Quitting everything is what I have been saying. Now that's not entirely true. The root of all of this stems from this reflection point....I have been teaching high school for 10 years (at the same school, I might add) so what do I want out of the next 10 years? And that's an interesting question. But the simple answer is that I know I can't go on doing everything that I have been doing.
In the first 10 years of your career I think you do need to jump in and get involved. You need to volunteer to work at conferences, host music festivals, work at summer music camps, network with colleagues, and serve the profession. Heck I think you always need to do that stuff but in the first 10 years of my career I have done ALL of that and simply put, I would like to stop for just a little bit and.....
Focus on my continually growing program. Professionally develop. Keep up on this blog. Prepare and present sessions at conferences. Play vibraphone, ukulele, and french horn. Heck maybe even audition to have my band perform at the state conference. I could even maybe attend CASMEC (California All State Music Education Conference) because I haven't attended 1 entire session or concert in the history of the conference (and previously the same was true at CBDA).
So the last few months have been really challenging for me as I have tried to sort out and prioritize my time and how I want to use it most effectively while barely maintaining an insane schedule. Last week I had my breaking point. The Wednesday I am supposed to leave to go to the CASMEC conference and be on the special projects committee with a car literally full of percussion equipment (that percussion schlep directly contributed to multiple mini meltdowns & minor injuries) I have no car because its in the shop and am hit in the same day with my tax bill and a ridiculous price tag on the repair. My spirits were crushed when making those hard adult decisions about money etc. and I just felt like the last thing I wanted to do was go to work at a conference that I wasn't even going to attend....again.
|Here's the percussion equipment I hauled down to Fresno.|
That became this....
|I call this percussion jenga.|
We call that burnout. And I am and was burned out BUT I will say that despite blistered feet and little sleep I got more out of the conference than I actually thought I would. While I am leaving the special projects team for next year's conference (because I know that when this conference comes to San Jose there will be NO way I am getting out of working that event) I was able to tap into more professional development than I would have thought. Within the first evening at our special projects team meeting I learned more about technology and the use of my ipad in the course of our first night hang than I have since I got it. People go to sessions to find out about cool apps and more effective ways to use technology in a classroom. Before the conference even started I got all of that without attending a single session. I got the opportunity to spend 4 days with my amazing group of friends on the special projects committee, the Fresno State Music Ed crew, and the rest of the CBDA conference volunteers, who just working and talking to them did help re-focus my energy about teaching and also help answer the question "what do I want in the next 10 years of my career?"
I don't really plan on fully answering that question because what I have learned in the first 10 years is that nothing ends up how you plan it....and that isn't necessarily a bad thing. I might not have seen an entire concert but I did get to spend hours hanging out with Third Coast Percussion who were our headlining guest artists for our opening concert (hence the ridiculous amount of percussion equipment in my car). I got to geek out with them about percussion and new music and had a great time hearing great percussion ensemble music. I got to spend some quality time with my one student who made the all state high school concert band. My former student teacher/friend/ Mr. Lane was there to rescue me when I needed a break from conference working to run around the exhibit hall. I made more friends and connections. I found out our marching band uniforms are in production. I finally got around to purchasing a text that I've been meaning to get for the AP Music Theory Class I am teaching in a few years. I got some advice on some tenor sax jazz ballads. As I drove home and as I type now I am amazed at how much I got out of the conference that I didn't really "attend" but "worked".
We have a pretty good thing going on here in California Music Education. So thanks to everyone for a great conference. Thanks to all of you who have been bugging me about what happened to the blog. I'm shifting some priorities to make time for the things that I enjoy and actually learned how to use twitter after having an account for a couple years....
Here's some more fun shots from the conference.
|Mr. Lane ANGRY bell|
|Mr. Lane "happy bell"|
|Paulo rocking the SJSU Marching Band Shako at the SJSU Booth|
|Rocking the shako myself|
|Rocking the exhibit hall by playing a pocket trumpet|
|I have fallen in love with this sage green plastic flute I can clean in my dishwasher. Not a bad sound either for the price :) Add that to my wish list of instruments I want to own....|
|Special Projects Dinner...besides the company the second best thing about working is the dinner that we get to have at the end of the conference! Jon Grantham ROCKED finding us a 5 star restaurant experience in Fresno....not an easy task.|
|A deconstructed drumstick. Box 5 dessert.|